Being right versus being happy: Which is more important?


“Why do we take things personally? Somebody says or does something and we feel hurt, neglected, offended and betrayed by the other one. We believe it’s the other person’s fault. He is responsible for how we feel. This is our ego speaking. Our ego thinks others should take us into consideration. Our ego doesn’t want to be criticised. It wants to be acknowledged: ‘I’m right!’

“When my ego takes over, I am fighting all day. I am in a constant struggle with the rest of the world, and it drains my energy. When you don’t things personally, no one has power over you. You’re free. You experience much more harmony and connection between you and other people. Your energy can go towards nice things instead of endlessly battling against the things that drive you crazy.

“Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy? How to not take things personally to be happy?

“It’s by shifting our focus from ‘me’ to ‘we’. Try to see the intention of the other one and make space for understanding, instead of irritation. Our brain produces 50,000 thoughts a day out of which only 10,000 are positive. You need to question your insecurity for taking it personally, because if you take it personally then there must be some truth in it… So that’s the moment to give yourself some empathy.

“By opening up, by being vulnerable, by telling what you feel without blaming the other one, you increase the chance that the other one will understand you.”

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